Good piece. FWIW, in my experience knowing lots of different types of girls and being the seemingly nonjudgmental type that everyone tells their secrets to...they absolutely are not less likely to cheat. Same as conservative men, who also are not less likely to cheat. So if fear of being betrayed is the main reason for seeking one out, it's a dumb reason. People's declarations of how wrong/bad they think cheating is and whether they would ever do such a thing are essentially meaningless and cheating is mostly contextual and circumstantial. But just saying...I know a country music loving, church-going, (at the time, not anymore lol) married with kids mom who literally banged the postman in his mail truck, which is 1. ridiculous, 2. actually illegal, and 3. not something I think a "libtard" woman would do. So, just saying, I think you're right on that one. There is one way to get pretty close to a rock solid certainty of not being cheated on, which is to get with a conservative woman AND make sure that she is literally perpetually pregnant or breast-feeding and so simply never in the hormonal/bodily/energy state of mind for sex (but btw, she won't be for you, either, much). So have fun with that, if lots of screaming babies and toddler and a wife who is always pregnant or recovering from it is your jam. But that's probably the only surefire way. The easier alternative is to just stop letting that fear rule your entire world and accept that most people get cheated on at least once and it sucks but it's not the end of the world.
Thing about being cheated on if you're a man is you can wind up raising someone else's kid.
Plus if she runs off with him you're still on the hook for alimony in most states.
But: yes, I don't think conservatism decreases your chance of getting cheated on. It might increase the chances of the other person being invested in trying to repair the marriage rather than divorcing you to 'find themselves' or something similar.
One of my clients is an older (50?) crazy blond “Christian, doesn’t celebrate Halloween) trophy MAGA mom, whose OCD husband is never around. Pretty sure they hate each other. Anyway, she love to talk when I show up, probably bored. Her eyes betray “supposed to be moral” beliefs… I can tell she needs it. And I totally would if I didn’t have to talk voter fraud conspiracy tard nonsense she brings up & just submit to my power! Like she’s not even self aware 🙄
Ah, I see you are also a semi voluntary confessional booth for the socially unacceptable expressions of everyone around you. How did such different people wind up in a similar situation?
I think for me I just like to know what's going on, and have a motivation to stay informed and not be fooled or deceived by people's "masks" and attempts to hide the parts they're ashamed of. So I learned to not punish people for dropping them, bc if you do then they obviously are incentivized not to. I think it probably comes from early childhood experiences of being extremely devastated and disappointed by people I trusted and feeling betrayed...and not wanting to be in that situation again, but also learning that almost everyone has their secrets and it's pointless expecting perfection unless you want to be alienated by everyone all the time. When it's your own parents that disappoint you and you're still young, you have no choice but to forgive them. But also you learn that if you want people to be real with you (even if ultimately it's a self-protective mechanism), you have to give them reason to trust you and that you won't screw them over or punish them for telling the truth. And then after you hear enough shit from enough people, you just learn to deal and expect everyone has their bad shit but they can still be people you mostly like and still have their good sides, and grant them some grace. I mean, there's a line obviously. But when I read people who flip out and go nuts just hearing about the existence of a total stranger doing something they don't like and wanting them to immediately die and to castigate them, to me it just reads as extreme terror and an effort at self-protection bc it makes them feel better to think the world is easily delineated into good and evil, that everyone on their side is good, and that they can always tell the difference.
“But when I read people who flip out and go nuts just hearing about the existence of a total stranger doing something they don't like and wanting them to immediately die and to castigate them, to me it just reads as extreme terror and an effort at self-protection bc it makes them feel better to think the world is easily delineated into good and evil, that everyone on their side is good, and that they can always tell the difference.”
💯
I understand impulse to violence, but genuine belief in moral superiority, or even factual certainty, baffles me.
Most people do not get cheated on. You just have awful people in your life, and you want to normalize bad behaviour by whores because that’s what you yourself are.
I don’t need anecdotal evidence because actual scientific evidence says about 1/3rd of married women cheat. So apparently you’re also surrounded by awful people. Maybe get better friends?
Most people have several relationships and date before they get married. Plenty of people get married more than once. More people cheat in unmarried relationships. This is one third of people cheat in marriage, you can assume it's more like 40-50% in other relationships. Multiple those odds over a few romantic relationships in your life, and yes, probablistically you are looking at a higher than 50% chance of being cheated on at some point. Also, saying things like "surround yourself with better people" and attempting to place the blame on the victim of someone else's deceit is just incredible lame and makes you seem like a generally hostile and unlikeable person.
You just sound smug and clueless because I guarantee you have friends or family that have cheated on someone, they just would never tell you bc you're so hostile and condescending. That's 2 out of 10 guys there, and again, that's just for married...you add in all the other romantic relationships people tend to have and that number goes way higher.
You should date Libtard Feminists - if you wanna become an (ostensibly) triple digit body count single guy in your 30's. Which is perfectly fine if your focus and top priority is something like building an online persona, a job stacking business, writing a novel or making AI generated music.
But the conservative girls are wife material - this is common sense. Take it from someone who knows - I married one 10 years ago.
I agree that it's not for everyone. You have to be Batman. But this is fine for me.
"An experienced girl has probably been exposed to just about everything there is to be exposed to sexually, so you won’t need to break her in with any of your more disgusting fetishes"
Well, Walt can do his thing, but most men with priorities in family formation aren't putting this at the top of their list when looking for a wife. Also, LOL on the thought you're less likely to get a dead bedroom with a previously ultra-promiscuous woman.
Also, many "experienced girls" have been traumatized by being "broken in" with "disgusting fetishes". They've done it, but it doesn't mean they would be willing to do any of this ever again. They simply don't want to be "abused" anymore. In worst case, they eventually become radical sex-negative feminists.
With an inexperienced girl, you get to try things without dealing with all the damage made by the men that came before you. You can do it properly, in a fun, exciting way, without traumatizing her.
Life has tradeoffs, it’s simply not possible to get the best of all worlds all the time. Top sexual experience isn’t necessarily compatible or a priority over wifing and mothering skills. I can’t imagine prioritizing my sex life over the well being of my children, JFC .
All I know is, in a world where 3 out of 4 women are tattooed femenists, spending your 20s/early 30s with a hard rule of "I will not fuck a woman with a tattoo or a femenist" doesn't sound like a very fun time!
I second this advice. All of this is essentially a description of my wife, except all her exes were women, so I didn’t even have to worry about the high body count. Best part is, a lot of these women actually want a conservative lifestyle for themselves while voting Blue. My wife is extremely happy to not work, take care of the kids, cook, and clean. Ok, the cleaning is begrudgingly, but it gets done. After all, she believes capitalism is unethical, so why would she work to support it? She’s gotten into gardening, and at this rate we’ll get a small homestead. How a woman votes is the least important thing about her. I say this, a decade into our relationship.
I think a lot of women aren't terribly tied to their political beliefs, but if you're right wing and her hobby is volunteering for the local Democrats you're going to have a problem. If she's into regular stuff but happens to vote Democrat, that's probably OK.
She identified as pansexual at the time, bisexual now. For feminist reasons, she had only dated women, but after 3 bad relationships in a row, 2 of which involved being cheated on for a man, she finally decided to change her Tinder settings to swipe on men, barely 20. I was the second man from Tinder to get a date with her, and convinced her to marry me in a little over a year. For that matter, she was the 3rd Tinder date I had.
So really we got lucky. I didn’t convince her to date men, other women convinced her to stop dating women. We could have easily matched with others and had many failed relationships. She wasn’t trying to hold onto her virginity, so she could have ended up with a fairly high body count in a few years, she just stopped when she found me.
Well, if you've been together for 10 years I'd say it worked out for you, and congratulations!
I would not have been so brave--I would have assumed someone like that would have had resentful attitudes toward men that would carry on into the relationship. But I'm old (Xennial) and they probably would have been much more of a political outlier in my time.
It's an interesting question, though. I've always had the suspicion there's a higher baseline level of bisexuality than previously thought, probably as some older evolutionary pathway for building same-sex alliances. The catch for the left is a bisexual can just choose to be straight.
Anyway, congrats on 10 years of successful marriage!
“in mainstream Girl Culture—at least on the coasts, though even there it’s for sure changing—it’s long been kind of unthinkable NOT to be a libtard” yep. Not to say girls can’t think for themselves but it goes against the grain of girl culture not to submit to the group vibe
As someone that was married to both types of women (ex was MAGA before it was cool and current is a "libtard", albeit a mature one), this article is pretty accurate.
Very good piece overall. Openness to experience is probably the trait that benefits most from matching in interpersonal relations, I think--has the biggest effect on interest. And your discussion of the tradeoffs associated with various ends of the personality spectrum is quite in-depth.
I think a lot of it is targeted at your particular taste in women, though--you've basically got it down to high openness, low conscientiousness, high IQ, low agreeableness, which isn't a huge slice of the population. (NTP for you Myers-Briggs folk.) One of your problems, I think, is you're cursed with a liberal personality and right-wing politics, though as you say women often don't take their politics that seriously.
I will contest that high openness, high conscientiousness, low agreeableness women are often *quite* kinky, you just have to do all the explicit negotiation stuff. They're also risk-averse, so it helps to have a stable career etc.--you do have to have some Batman energy, I agree, and you're much more of a Joker.
But I agree with the overall point, which has been made many times and is the big reason lefty women (high openness, low conscientiousness) are so paranoid about players--it's well known lefties want to sleep around more, righties want to get married and start pumping out those kids. This was a big reason second wave feminism started rising in the seventies after lots of men used the sexual revolution as an excuse to play Hugh Hefner.
Dang. Is the red pill just a filtering process to groom men into worthy mates for conservative type women while filtering the rest, gaslighting them into thinking they should stay incels? That's so incredibly cucked.
Probably high empathy, low theory of mind. The autists I know care a lot about others, and are heavily affected by their emotions, but have no idea what they’re feeling so it doesn’t show up unless they’re explicit.
I read the free part of your article about 'Rebecca' and I think the women you date are psychotic to the core. Are you a high body count man? I don't think most nice boys who were raised in the church would get along with 'tattooed art hoes'.
This, "But the crucial thing is this type of woman is rabidly leftist specifically because she’s revolted by the low status of right wing politics" is absolutely true.
The most important thing for DC and NYC PMC NPCs is signaling their status by being progressive. It has nothing to do with policy.
For me, I've been a National Review squish conservative for years, and most of my boyfriends were pretty buttoned-up professionals.
I married a healthcare professional who wears ironed shirts when he watches TV at home. --shrug--
I've read this piece and I find it incredibly phenomenally stupid.
Like this part:
"For one thing their disgust sensitivity is through the fucking roof—they’ll think all your fetishes are gross and also have this incredibly simplistic understanding of masculinity in which you’re a weak faggot who deserves to be tortured to death if you e.g. have soft hands or pay someone to put together your furniture or some shit."
Because you are a faggot, if you can't even put your own furniture or some shit. And your fetishes are disgusting.
You aren't being clever, you aren't even being a predator, you are still the same stupid consumerist, who can't stop himself but run on the same hedonistic treadmill as the zombie lefties.
Good piece. FWIW, in my experience knowing lots of different types of girls and being the seemingly nonjudgmental type that everyone tells their secrets to...they absolutely are not less likely to cheat. Same as conservative men, who also are not less likely to cheat. So if fear of being betrayed is the main reason for seeking one out, it's a dumb reason. People's declarations of how wrong/bad they think cheating is and whether they would ever do such a thing are essentially meaningless and cheating is mostly contextual and circumstantial. But just saying...I know a country music loving, church-going, (at the time, not anymore lol) married with kids mom who literally banged the postman in his mail truck, which is 1. ridiculous, 2. actually illegal, and 3. not something I think a "libtard" woman would do. So, just saying, I think you're right on that one. There is one way to get pretty close to a rock solid certainty of not being cheated on, which is to get with a conservative woman AND make sure that she is literally perpetually pregnant or breast-feeding and so simply never in the hormonal/bodily/energy state of mind for sex (but btw, she won't be for you, either, much). So have fun with that, if lots of screaming babies and toddler and a wife who is always pregnant or recovering from it is your jam. But that's probably the only surefire way. The easier alternative is to just stop letting that fear rule your entire world and accept that most people get cheated on at least once and it sucks but it's not the end of the world.
Thing about being cheated on if you're a man is you can wind up raising someone else's kid.
Plus if she runs off with him you're still on the hook for alimony in most states.
But: yes, I don't think conservatism decreases your chance of getting cheated on. It might increase the chances of the other person being invested in trying to repair the marriage rather than divorcing you to 'find themselves' or something similar.
One of my clients is an older (50?) crazy blond “Christian, doesn’t celebrate Halloween) trophy MAGA mom, whose OCD husband is never around. Pretty sure they hate each other. Anyway, she love to talk when I show up, probably bored. Her eyes betray “supposed to be moral” beliefs… I can tell she needs it. And I totally would if I didn’t have to talk voter fraud conspiracy tard nonsense she brings up & just submit to my power! Like she’s not even self aware 🙄
Many such cases.
Ah, I see you are also a semi voluntary confessional booth for the socially unacceptable expressions of everyone around you. How did such different people wind up in a similar situation?
I think for me I just like to know what's going on, and have a motivation to stay informed and not be fooled or deceived by people's "masks" and attempts to hide the parts they're ashamed of. So I learned to not punish people for dropping them, bc if you do then they obviously are incentivized not to. I think it probably comes from early childhood experiences of being extremely devastated and disappointed by people I trusted and feeling betrayed...and not wanting to be in that situation again, but also learning that almost everyone has their secrets and it's pointless expecting perfection unless you want to be alienated by everyone all the time. When it's your own parents that disappoint you and you're still young, you have no choice but to forgive them. But also you learn that if you want people to be real with you (even if ultimately it's a self-protective mechanism), you have to give them reason to trust you and that you won't screw them over or punish them for telling the truth. And then after you hear enough shit from enough people, you just learn to deal and expect everyone has their bad shit but they can still be people you mostly like and still have their good sides, and grant them some grace. I mean, there's a line obviously. But when I read people who flip out and go nuts just hearing about the existence of a total stranger doing something they don't like and wanting them to immediately die and to castigate them, to me it just reads as extreme terror and an effort at self-protection bc it makes them feel better to think the world is easily delineated into good and evil, that everyone on their side is good, and that they can always tell the difference.
“But when I read people who flip out and go nuts just hearing about the existence of a total stranger doing something they don't like and wanting them to immediately die and to castigate them, to me it just reads as extreme terror and an effort at self-protection bc it makes them feel better to think the world is easily delineated into good and evil, that everyone on their side is good, and that they can always tell the difference.”
💯
I understand impulse to violence, but genuine belief in moral superiority, or even factual certainty, baffles me.
Most people do not get cheated on. You just have awful people in your life, and you want to normalize bad behaviour by whores because that’s what you yourself are.
ballpark the size of your regular IRL social circle, because mine is of a decent size and my experiences match hers.
I don’t need anecdotal evidence because actual scientific evidence says about 1/3rd of married women cheat. So apparently you’re also surrounded by awful people. Maybe get better friends?
Most people have several relationships and date before they get married. Plenty of people get married more than once. More people cheat in unmarried relationships. This is one third of people cheat in marriage, you can assume it's more like 40-50% in other relationships. Multiple those odds over a few romantic relationships in your life, and yes, probablistically you are looking at a higher than 50% chance of being cheated on at some point. Also, saying things like "surround yourself with better people" and attempting to place the blame on the victim of someone else's deceit is just incredible lame and makes you seem like a generally hostile and unlikeable person.
Actually I just looked up the figures again and it’s only 15 percent of married women and 20 percent of married men.
Place the blame on the victim? You’re the one whose friends cheat on their husbands. Why are women so often trying to dodge accountability? Weird
How are they even collecting these figures? I don't trust sociological survey data for shit.
You just sound smug and clueless because I guarantee you have friends or family that have cheated on someone, they just would never tell you bc you're so hostile and condescending. That's 2 out of 10 guys there, and again, that's just for married...you add in all the other romantic relationships people tend to have and that number goes way higher.
Uh oh, the chad is angry.
your attempt to shift radix to social shaming makes you functionally identical to those you are attempting to criticize.
what is it you types say?
no bad tactics, only bad targets
this is why i spend time with the people who advocate for death camps, is i can’t say they’re wrong after interactions like this.
You should date Libtard Feminists - if you wanna become an (ostensibly) triple digit body count single guy in your 30's. Which is perfectly fine if your focus and top priority is something like building an online persona, a job stacking business, writing a novel or making AI generated music.
But the conservative girls are wife material - this is common sense. Take it from someone who knows - I married one 10 years ago.
I agree that it's not for everyone. You have to be Batman. But this is fine for me.
I'm Batman.
"An experienced girl has probably been exposed to just about everything there is to be exposed to sexually, so you won’t need to break her in with any of your more disgusting fetishes"
Well, Walt can do his thing, but most men with priorities in family formation aren't putting this at the top of their list when looking for a wife. Also, LOL on the thought you're less likely to get a dead bedroom with a previously ultra-promiscuous woman.
Also, many "experienced girls" have been traumatized by being "broken in" with "disgusting fetishes". They've done it, but it doesn't mean they would be willing to do any of this ever again. They simply don't want to be "abused" anymore. In worst case, they eventually become radical sex-negative feminists.
With an inexperienced girl, you get to try things without dealing with all the damage made by the men that came before you. You can do it properly, in a fun, exciting way, without traumatizing her.
💯
Life has tradeoffs, it’s simply not possible to get the best of all worlds all the time. Top sexual experience isn’t necessarily compatible or a priority over wifing and mothering skills. I can’t imagine prioritizing my sex life over the well being of my children, JFC .
Dude just needs to suck it up and go poly. I almost never recommend it but in his case it might actually make his life easier.
I think he's much closer to that *other* fellow from Batman #1, and I don't mean Hugo Strange.
And, you know, she left him for Ivy. Though I hear he's with Punchline now.
All I know is, in a world where 3 out of 4 women are tattooed femenists, spending your 20s/early 30s with a hard rule of "I will not fuck a woman with a tattoo or a femenist" doesn't sound like a very fun time!
How on earth are 3 out of 4 women tattooed feminists?
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hyperbole
Wtf did i just read
I second this advice. All of this is essentially a description of my wife, except all her exes were women, so I didn’t even have to worry about the high body count. Best part is, a lot of these women actually want a conservative lifestyle for themselves while voting Blue. My wife is extremely happy to not work, take care of the kids, cook, and clean. Ok, the cleaning is begrudgingly, but it gets done. After all, she believes capitalism is unethical, so why would she work to support it? She’s gotten into gardening, and at this rate we’ll get a small homestead. How a woman votes is the least important thing about her. I say this, a decade into our relationship.
I think a lot of women aren't terribly tied to their political beliefs, but if you're right wing and her hobby is volunteering for the local Democrats you're going to have a problem. If she's into regular stuff but happens to vote Democrat, that's probably OK.
I'm curious, how'd you convert the hasbian?
She identified as pansexual at the time, bisexual now. For feminist reasons, she had only dated women, but after 3 bad relationships in a row, 2 of which involved being cheated on for a man, she finally decided to change her Tinder settings to swipe on men, barely 20. I was the second man from Tinder to get a date with her, and convinced her to marry me in a little over a year. For that matter, she was the 3rd Tinder date I had.
So really we got lucky. I didn’t convince her to date men, other women convinced her to stop dating women. We could have easily matched with others and had many failed relationships. She wasn’t trying to hold onto her virginity, so she could have ended up with a fairly high body count in a few years, she just stopped when she found me.
Well, if you've been together for 10 years I'd say it worked out for you, and congratulations!
I would not have been so brave--I would have assumed someone like that would have had resentful attitudes toward men that would carry on into the relationship. But I'm old (Xennial) and they probably would have been much more of a political outlier in my time.
It's an interesting question, though. I've always had the suspicion there's a higher baseline level of bisexuality than previously thought, probably as some older evolutionary pathway for building same-sex alliances. The catch for the left is a bisexual can just choose to be straight.
Anyway, congrats on 10 years of successful marriage!
“in mainstream Girl Culture—at least on the coasts, though even there it’s for sure changing—it’s long been kind of unthinkable NOT to be a libtard” yep. Not to say girls can’t think for themselves but it goes against the grain of girl culture not to submit to the group vibe
As someone that was married to both types of women (ex was MAGA before it was cool and current is a "libtard", albeit a mature one), this article is pretty accurate.
Very good piece overall. Openness to experience is probably the trait that benefits most from matching in interpersonal relations, I think--has the biggest effect on interest. And your discussion of the tradeoffs associated with various ends of the personality spectrum is quite in-depth.
I think a lot of it is targeted at your particular taste in women, though--you've basically got it down to high openness, low conscientiousness, high IQ, low agreeableness, which isn't a huge slice of the population. (NTP for you Myers-Briggs folk.) One of your problems, I think, is you're cursed with a liberal personality and right-wing politics, though as you say women often don't take their politics that seriously.
I will contest that high openness, high conscientiousness, low agreeableness women are often *quite* kinky, you just have to do all the explicit negotiation stuff. They're also risk-averse, so it helps to have a stable career etc.--you do have to have some Batman energy, I agree, and you're much more of a Joker.
But I agree with the overall point, which has been made many times and is the big reason lefty women (high openness, low conscientiousness) are so paranoid about players--it's well known lefties want to sleep around more, righties want to get married and start pumping out those kids. This was a big reason second wave feminism started rising in the seventies after lots of men used the sexual revolution as an excuse to play Hugh Hefner.
Dang. Is the red pill just a filtering process to groom men into worthy mates for conservative type women while filtering the rest, gaslighting them into thinking they should stay incels? That's so incredibly cucked.
I'm a bisexual liberal Republican vegan who's HBD-pilled. Terminally online men love me!
I suspect autists have both a low disgust and low empathic response 🤣🤣
Probably high empathy, low theory of mind. The autists I know care a lot about others, and are heavily affected by their emotions, but have no idea what they’re feeling so it doesn’t show up unless they’re explicit.
I read the free part of your article about 'Rebecca' and I think the women you date are psychotic to the core. Are you a high body count man? I don't think most nice boys who were raised in the church would get along with 'tattooed art hoes'.
This, "But the crucial thing is this type of woman is rabidly leftist specifically because she’s revolted by the low status of right wing politics" is absolutely true.
The most important thing for DC and NYC PMC NPCs is signaling their status by being progressive. It has nothing to do with policy.
For me, I've been a National Review squish conservative for years, and most of my boyfriends were pretty buttoned-up professionals.
I married a healthcare professional who wears ironed shirts when he watches TV at home. --shrug--
You're probably both low-openness, high-conscientiousness, high IQ...in short, a match!
Hi Walt
Just out of curiosity have you taken the big 5 and if so what did you score?
yeah had my entire community take it last year
https://www.waltbismarck.com/p/the-walt-right-big-five-survey
my scores were
100 O / 19 C / 85 E / 15 A / 50 N
You are really sick bro. Hope you get help.
I've read this piece and I find it incredibly phenomenally stupid.
Like this part:
"For one thing their disgust sensitivity is through the fucking roof—they’ll think all your fetishes are gross and also have this incredibly simplistic understanding of masculinity in which you’re a weak faggot who deserves to be tortured to death if you e.g. have soft hands or pay someone to put together your furniture or some shit."
Because you are a faggot, if you can't even put your own furniture or some shit. And your fetishes are disgusting.
You aren't being clever, you aren't even being a predator, you are still the same stupid consumerist, who can't stop himself but run on the same hedonistic treadmill as the zombie lefties.